1.) I peed in my seat at church when I was 6 years old because my mom wouldn't let me leave to go to the restroom. In her defense, I always made excuses to get out of church and had cried "wolf" one too many times.
2.) I asked a coworker when her baby was due (and she wasn't even pregnant). But karma bit me in the butt later in life when 4 people who lived at the senior living community where I worked accused me of being pregnant even though I wasn't! :) I do have a good excuse for having a big belly besides being a foodie, though; I inherited (PKD) Polycystic Kidney Disease and my kidneys may eventually swell to 30 pounds each.
3.) I said that I was from Hogeye very loudly at Cafe Milano from a balcony table (a jazz restaurant that used to be in downtown Nashville, TN) when my friend introduced me to the owner and everyone in the place stopped eating and dropped their jaws (and their forks).
4.) My skirt fell off when I stepped out of the car right in front of my brother-in-law (whom I had just met). The worst part was that we were in the parking lot about to go in and attend our uncle's memorial service! Later when I told my husband, he asked his brother "What took you so long?" since I and my husband married just 1 day after meeting
in person (and we first met online through eHarmony just 8 days prior to marrying).
5.) I ran my minivan into my neighbor's barn which had just recently been replaced since a tornado had hit it. I was driving and my neighbor said "Follow me." so I took him literally and tried to squeezed my vehicle between a 3 foot wide space. My neighbor said "At least she CAN hit the broadside of a barn!" and he and my husband laughed and laughed. I have the best excuse because I have no depth perception since I am blind in one eye.