top of page

I Hate Cigarettes

...because apparently it is illegal to put out other people's cigarettes with urine so I plan on inventing a perfume made out of synthetic ingredients that smells like cat piss so that I could add it to the water inside my Super Soaker water gun instead.

I watched my father slowly die a painful death from lung cancer caused by smoking cigarettes and I am allergic to cigarette smoke. I just got out of the hospital after breaking 3 ribs and had barely gotten over bronchitis. I live in a smoke-free community, but a lot of people here ignore this policy. A few nights ago I just wanted to relax in the hot tub with my husband and young child who we were baby sitting when a large group of people were all smoking a few feet away from us. I asked them to put out their cigarettes, because this is a non-smoking community. Then one woman started yelling at me and refused. Her friend called her by name "Shay" (because they were high and dumb), so I asked her how to spell that since I'm a narc. I told her that I was at high risk for getting pnumonia with my newly broken ribs. Then she said she could do CPR because she has paddles in her car. I told her that you can't do CPR on people with broken ribs (or osteoporosis). It's shocking that someone who works in the healthcare field has no regard for her own life (much less other people). I only called the security officer, but by the time they got there everyone was gone. I couldn't call the police since she did not make a specific threat. I did go speak to a staff member in the leasing office the next day and she said people steal their surveillance cameras and they are too cheap to pay about $2,000.00 for the mounted cameras. She just said to call our 24-hour security officers.

15 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All
bottom of page